Comes Around Every Year

Thirty-nine years ago this coming July, my grandfather died in a car accident in Mount Olive, NC. He was the drunk driver. One year ago this February, my cousin died in a car accident in Mount Olive, NC. He was also the drunk driver. Both of these accidents effected my life greatly, each in their own way. With my grandaddy gone, I don't have many men in my life, and seeing as Eric was only two years older than myself, the accident opened my eyes. And, although both of them were drinking, I don't blame anyone for them passing. I was sitting in the living room with my grandmother just last week thinking, " I wish grandaddy was here." Then I thought about my aunt, cousins and even my cousins daughter. They wouldn't be here if my grandaddy was still alive. I might not even be here, as my grandparents would more than likely stayed in North Carolina. Now, with Eric's passing, I find time to talk to my family members in NC, whether it be by phone, letter or facebook. Although, I will admit I don't as much as I should. This just goes to show... EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON!! We may not understand it now, but God has a plan for us and whether we like it or not, these things are going to happen.

Since the anniversary of Eric's passing is approaching, I have been thinking about how much my life has changed in the past year. Last year, I was very unstable. I would be happy one moment and sad the next few hours. I remember Valentine's day 2009 relativly well. The days before were hard, seeing as I was very depressed (I was diagnosed last January). I was working Valentine's Day. I was ontime and didn't have a lot of calls. Around 10 am I received a call about a man and his wife wanting a room for just one night. We joked around and talked a good bit and he told me if I gave him a good rate, that he would bring me a valentine. I gave him the rate, and he booked the room, but I didn't expect anything when he arrived. About two hours before I was set to leave, I got a call from the front desk saying I had a guest bring me a valentine. I told them I would be down to get it when I got off. However, when my coworker heard I had gotten a valentine waiting a the front desk, she was thrilled for me and told me to go down to get it. I got a pink rose from someone I've NEVER met!! The first time I EVER get a rose/flowers and it's from someone I don't know and will probably never meet. That man and his wife made my entire day and I never got to thank them. I went home that night and my sister and parents were going out, and I was content with staying home seeing as I had to be at work again the next morning. However, the next morning I got up late. My mom came in to wake me up and she was talking to my aunt. My mom talking to her at seven am? This was NOT good!! When my mom got off the phone, she told me Eric died in a car accident at 1:45 that am. I stopped rushing around trying to get ready so I wouldn't be late and I cried. As I thought about it throughout the day, I cried somemore. When my coworker from the day before came in I told her what happened. She even said "You can't catch a break can you?" I don't remember much from the rest of that day, except that Monday we decided we HAD to be in NC. The rest of that week was hard to get through because Eric, his sister, Heather, and their parents were very close, it was hard to watch them break down. (I love you all so much!) This year though, I am living in another state and I get to go to church and have an amazing relationship with God that I certainly did not have last year. I miss my family, friends, and even my job, but things seem to be better. I have better relationships with family and everything is looking up, all because I finally have God as a regular part of my life.

I want to challenge everyone to have a relationship with God. If you already have one, what is he telling you? He wants me to change the world through my experiences. If you haven't heard it yet, listen to Temporary Home by Carrie Underwood. "This is our temporary home" it isn't where we belong.

I want to send out a quick thank you to Mrs. Tonya and Mrs. Jennifer. Each week I'm in your class, you say something that applies to my life and I thank God that He's brought you into my life.

Much Love and God Bless,
Jessica